2010-04-24: Bangin' Good Time



Guest Starring:

David, Joshua, and Mary

Date: April 24, 2010


Breakfast with heroes! Erin's not so good with kids…

"Bangin' Good Time"

Warehouse Apartment - Brooklyn

It still feels strange, not hiding. In fact, it feels so strange that amid the stares of her fans, who were just glad to see that she was okay, Erin eventually fled back to the safety of the warehouse. Said warehouse feels more like home than anything else, since it was literally a safe haven for the past several weeks. Her apartment can't even compare. Not to mention the fact that the latter is slightly damaged. It's not unlivable, but… It's so very vulnerable.

She's been in the news the past few days, which she expected. It's hard listening to the people who are saying this is all some publicity stunt and that she did it for the attention. Of course, that comes from one network in particular, who's known for its conservative views. Maybe she's not telling the whole truth, but the fact is, her story is closer to the truth than what the conspiracy theorists are saying.

Being in the spotlight is uncomfortable. Thankfully, these stories aren't headlines, which means they'll die back down to reasonable levels eventually, and she can get on with her career, hopefully the less worse for wear. Back at home, she lies sprawled across the couch, an ice pack situated on her face. Just because she let Cody punch her doesn't mean she wants the signs of the assault to remain there for longer than they have to.


There's a table full of three excited little children eating cereal that has way too much sugar for their bodies to digest properly. Cody's doesn't really care, she's sitting at the table with them with one of the biggest bowls full of the same. The table is littered with things to add to the already diabetic coma inducing fare in their bowls. Granulated sugar, chocolate syrup, mini marshmallows, gummy bears, cookie bits… It's sickening, actually.

"This is the best breakfast ever!!" Little David exclaims as he adds another tiny handfull of mini marshmallows and a giant squeeze of chocolate syrup to his cereal.

A curly little redhead, Mary, nods emphatically as she stuffs a spoon full of Captain Crunch mixed with gummy bears and banana slices. She's a girl, she had to have one thing healthy in the bowl. The two little boys aren't as health conscious as she is and opted to have breakfast without fruit.

"Hey Erin, why don't you come over and have breakfast with us?" Cody asks before she shoves a big bite of her own cereal into her mouth. All three children are giggling like mad as they try to copy the recipe she is using. It just looks SO GOOD!! Captain Crunch on the bottom, a layer of bananas, a layer of gummy bears, a layer of marshmallows, all of it drowned in chocolate milk and then topped with a big swirl of whipped cream and three maraschino cherries.

"I want some like that!!" Joshua, a boy that Erin should be more familiar with, exclaims as Cody piles more whipped cream into her bowl. "I want mine to look like yours!!" Though his bowl is a lot smaller, he has been trying his best to load it with all the same delicious fixins.



That is Erin's reply to EVERYTHING. Because she isn't really a fan of children, or animals, or anything that crawls or makes messes while lacking the ability to properly clean them up. Plus, as time goes on, the children just seem to acquire MORE ENERGY.

"What the h— heck— " Erin catches herself as she sits up, "Are you… Feeding… those…

"…kids. Cody, you can't give kids sugar!" The ice pack falls into her lap, and Erin winces. Cold! Picking it back up, she presses it to the awesome shiner she's got and stands, despite the fact that she was going to avoid kids. Especially hyper kids, including the creepy one who's so much less creepy now that he's talking. Okay, kids aren't that bad, but she still prefers adult conversation. Sitting down at the table, Erin grabs a bowl and only the Captain Crunch. Given that there's kids all around her, though, she's not going to be surprised if she winds up with a bowlful of gummy bears in chocolate milk.

Eying Joshua warily, she passes the gummy bears over to him. She isn't particularly keen on him throwing some sort of fit because he can't have them. Thus far, she's managed to avoid the brunt of his screaming, and plans to do so for the foreseeable future, as well. "You know, you should be having something healthy," she says. "Unfortunately, Cody won't let me cook."


"Mmph, ish ish heawfy.." Cody utters with a completely full mouth. Swallowing the large bunch of sugary stuff, she points her spoon at Erin and puckers her lips a little in thought. "You know, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. If they don't load up at breakfast, they'll never have enough energy to make it to lunch. Then where would we be? A house full of nearly comatose children."

Then she takes another huge mouthful of cereal and chews, trying not to smile as she swallows it down. "Besides, Pyle is coming in a little while to pick them up. Can't give him too easy a time while he's bringing them home, can we?" There's definitely a glint of mischief in her eyes and even more assuredly, a method to her madness.


"No, it's not," Erin answers, though she does put some bananas on her cereal, which makes the sugary goodness of captain crunch a little more bearable. Speaking of bears, there are some in her bowl, which she's sure she didn't put there. But she knew that was coming. And, finding no regular milk on the table and not wanting to run the risk of getting white milk while the kids pile sugar into her bowl, she opts for the chocolate, instead. FINE. The ice pack is set aside so she can eat.

Where did Cody even get all these gummy bears? Erin eyes the pile of them, AND SPEAKING OF PILES…

"Hah, genius," Erin states, when Cody's plan becomes apparent. This draws a smile from the actress, who, despite earlier complaints, is rather enjoying her unhealthy bowl of cereal, bananas, and a few gummy bears. "You know, you could have made this far worse by giving them Lucky Charms," she says.


"LUCKY CHARMS!!" comes a chorus of three little voices as David leads the round of spoons hammering the table and the chant of "LU-CKY CHARMS!! LU-CKY CHARMS!! LU-CKY CHARMS!!"

Looking over to Erin, Cody raises her eyebrows and silently takes another spoonful of cereal. She chews quietly for a few minutes, taking mouthful after mouthful of the delicious pile of crap in her giant bowl. "You know," she says thoughtfully, looking toward the three little monsters. "I bet if you changed that to MICK-DON-ALDS!! MICK-DON-ALDS!! You'll get that for lunch. Whaddya say guys?"

"I'm not a guy!" Mary says stubbornly as she bangs the end of her spoon on the table again to emphasize her point. "I'm a girl!!"


Oh god, what has she DONE? Erin's jaw kind of drops as the kids begin demanding some other cereal - which they don't have - by banging their spoons on the table. That's it. She's going to explode. She's going to explode and kick them all out of the house and lock all the doors and become a hermit crazy cat lady, albeit without the cats, because she doesn't like those, either. Kids scare her.

"Stop— STOP!" She finally says. Despite Cody's infinite patience and recommendation that they should later scream 'MCDONALD'S' at Pyle, she isn't going to take this right now! God, she should be able to get them to shut up somehow. There has to be a way to— to…

"There's a monster in our basement!" she says, desperately.


All the children freeze in mid bang, their eyes so wide they look like little planets on their faces. Then Joshua takes a deep breath. Cody is quick to react and jumps from her chair, quickly grabbing up the little boy. "Erin, Mary, David!! Get down! On the floor!!"

Mary and David don't even hesitate to scramble from their chairs and hide under the table in a little huddle, their eyes quickly filling with tears as Mary starts to wail. This only agitates Joshua more and he begins to scream. Suddenly a invisible claws begin to shred against the walls, the buffet of junk food, and even Cody as she hugs him tight.

"Ssshhh… Joshua.. Shhhhh it's okay… Shhhhh… There's no monster, she's only joking." She rocks him back and forth gently until he calms down. The panic attack only lasts for a minute, maybe two. Then she bends down to wave the other two children toward her. They instantly cling to her leg, Mary sobs as large tears pour down her face. David is more stoic and simply hugs onto Cody's leg as she alternately pats their heads. "Guys, Erin was just joking… It's okay. There's no monster."

"Th-tha-that was a mean joke!" Mary stutters between sobs as she buries her face in Cody's leg. All of a sudden, Cody's hair drops from her head into a pile on the floor. Confused, she looks down and then to Erin, then between David and Mary. Then she rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "Watch out for the little redhead Erin, she can turn you bald."


Erin swears. That certainly didn't go as intended! It was supposed to be a campfire story of sorts. Stop them in their tracks in awe and amazement as she made up some weird story about Emily and told them not to go in the basement EVER. Then they'd go off and play Monster-in-the-Basement until Pyle arrived and they could all have some peace.

But things don't work out that way, and Erin finds herself hitting the deck. Again. Covering her head while hoping Cody can get the little brat under control, Erin might just actually be reaching out to protect the two others. Not that she'll ever admit that.

When it's over, she stands, turning most of her ire toward Cody. That's mostly because there's a faint glow in her eyes, and she doesn't want any of the kids to think she's mad at them, even if she is. Children! How anyone can spawn them is far beyond Erin's comprehension. Especially when they have the power to create huge cuts in other people… And walls. Gritting her teeth, she concentrates on her breathing until she doesn't want to give everyone a good case of rabies. After all, they're just kids being kids.

Muttering something about kids with powers they don't understand, Erin sits back down at the table, shoveling a spoonful of gummy bear cereal into her face.

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