2007-06-11: Crack Was Used


Elena_icon.gif Cass_icon.gif Lachlan_icon.gif Gene_icon.gif Jack_icon.gif

Summary: Cass's room at Beth Israel is once again teeming with well-wishers, including a pirate, a ninja, and flowers with sunglasses.

Date It Happened: June 11, 2007

Crack Was Used

Beth Israel Hospital, Brooklyn, New York

The past week or so for Cass has gone much the same as the weeks before it. However, she's been slowly eased off the morphine so her speech has become much more understandable (if less entertaining). There are still some of the pitfalls of the smaller doses and still seeing some random things, but for the most part she's doing better and getting antsy to get out of the hospital. The TV is on - it is not the smurfs - playing one of those twenty-four hour news stations while Cass just lies back and watches.


Elena has stopped by, again, for the dozenth time and this is the first time she's actually encountered Cass awake. And luckily it looks like perfect timing, because she's carrying a cake tin with her. The smell coming from it indicates that she had only baked it about an hour or so ago, but she had brought more food to her friend, who's probably had to suffer through the terrible hospital food. And yes, it smells like fresh-baked banana loaf. She didn't bring flowers this time, but the cake should make up for it. "You're awake! I thought I'd never catch you awake," she says with a laugh, moving over and pushing her hand through her hair, her right hand, which looks encased in a layer of gauze.

"Ok. Do I look scary?" Jack adjusts the swatch of black cloth that's covering his face from the cheekbones down. A matching hood swathes his hair and neck, and is tucked into a black jacket that's snug at the forearms, but loose and flowing around the torso. The jacket is in turn tucked into a pair of trousers that are bound from the calves down for ease of movement. And if there were any questions about his attire, the split-toed boots thoroughly settle the issue. That's right, Jack is wearing a ninja suit.

Jack turns to glance at Lachlan, whom he's standing next to just outside the door to Cass' room. "Nevermind. Of course I look scary. Let's do this."

"How the bloody hell would I know?" growls Lachlan as he adjusts his tri-corn hat for the thirteenth time. "Can't see a bloody thing." He refers, of course, to the eyepatch that is currently shifting from the right to the left eye (it's made this switch at least twice before). This coupled with the fake hook, bright red, gaudy captain's coat, and the trousers and boots all lead to the same conclusion: Captain Lachlan Deatley has come aboard the HMS Beth Israel, and God help everyone. But this is about as ready as he'll ever get, so after checking his inner jacket pocket (he has one!) for something, he gives a nod to Jack before turning the handle to Cass' room (with his free hand) and starting to push it open. His presence is announced with a boisterous, "Arrrrr, mateys!" And promptly followed by a blank stare when he spots Elena also in the room. Er. This … this wasn't part of the plan.

"Elena!" Cass pushes herself up a bit and smiles as the Latina enters the room. "It's good to see you. The drugs make me all sleepy and stuff. Sorry." Not really like it's her fault or anything, but she feels bad that people have come to visit her and she wasn't awake for it. "Mmm. Whatever that is, it smells delicious." And home baked. Something that will definitely go a long way in this place of horrible hospital foods. However, answers are interrupted by Lachlan entering as….a pirate. It's enough to make Cass just blink and stare. "What the…" In the background the news reports about escaped mental hospital patients.

"Banana bread," Elena says with a grin, setting the cake tin carefully on her bedside table and leans over to give Cass a quick and gentle hug. "How are you feeling? You look so much better," she says, pulling away….and when people enter the room, she turns around, a welcome smile on her face……….only to freeze when she sees a ninja and a pirate walk in the hospital room.

Her smile freezes on her face.

And then, before anyone knows it, there's a THUMP as Elena collapses on the floor, laughing -hysterically-. She's clutching her side, wheezing, trying to get a breath and -failing-. What. WHAT.
Jack is amused by Lachlan's bitching, but he tries hard not to let it show. Instead he opts for sympathy. "At least you don't gotta wear a mask. This thing is stickin' to my stubble somethin'-Oi! Uh!" The next bit is an aside to Lachlan. "You got the easy accent, too. How the hell do ninjas talk?"

After clearing his throat, Jack strides in to back up his pirate cohort, and he's not made any more shy by Elena's presence. "Hitherto and wetherthou, fair maidens. Greetings an' stuff from the land o' the—ahh, fuck it. Who needs a drink?"

It's bad enough that he was caught wearing this ridiculous get-up. It's worse that he's getting /laughed at/ about it. Lachlan can only stand and stare in horror, up until the magic word: drink. He's never been much of an actor, but he's determined to stay in-character for Cass' sake. Turning toward Jack, he points at the Irishman with his hook. "Avast! A ninja! My mortal enemy!" His hand goes for his plastic musket tucked into his belt. A bit of fumbling and he's got it out and pointed. "Die scurvy dog!"

CLICK goes the cap-gun. Apparently he loaded a dud cap. Think fast, Lachlan! "Argh, me musket's wet from the salty air!" Perfect.

There's really no words for what is going through Cass' head. Because she's not sure if this is jut another one of her hallucinations or what. But, Elena is laughing meaning that /she/ sees them, too. "What. The." That's all she can really manage to utter at the moment. But she's grinning.

A twitchy hand emerges form the other side of the bed, Elena grabbing onto the edge as she struggles to get off the floor. "I….can't breathe…" she wheezes, her other hand coming up to wipe it across her eyes. And -then- Lachlan decides to be in character. She can't handle it anymore. The hand lets go. Back to the floor she goes, laughing even harder as Jack greets them with the most UN-NINJA LINE ever and Lachlan tries to pop a pirate cap on Jack's ninja ass….and fails. But the LINE. The LINE. It is PRICELESS. "That…that….you….you're all…" She can't even talk, she's laughing so hard.

Jack is already pulling a pint of whiskey from inside his preposterous ninja jerkin. Where he was keeping it concealed is anybody's guess, but it's warm. Despite this, he's got it open and raised to his lips in record time. After several hearty swallows, he passes the liquor to Lachlan and wipes his mouth off on a ninja glove.

Now fully prepared for this legendary clash of the titans, Jack draws a four-inch knife that's molded from bright green foam out of the back of his belt and brandishes it menacingly. Each faux-strike in Lachlan's direction is punctuated by ninja-speak. "Inasmuch!" JAB. "Wherefor!" SLICE. "Now you are defenseless, sir! Come hither and taste my ninja weapon!" POKE.

Making his way through the hospital, Gene makes his way down the hallway. He silently muses over the last week. Was he right to say those things about Nathan? Is he someone that Gene should be wary of? Should he be concerned about his health and try exercise more to get buff and sexy?

Thinking these things and more, Gene moves through the hallway holding a get-well soon balloon and a gift. Currently he wears his usual jeans and sneakers. This day, he wears a black t-shirt with a fake name tag that has the 'HELLO MY NAME IS…' on the top with the following written in handwritten print:

'Inigo Montoya.
you killed my father.
prepare to die.'

The gift Gene has seems plastic pot with a couple of plastic flowers. Not your usual flowers, but rather, the large flowers with the big grinning faces and sunglasses. It's likely one of those toys that play music and dance when there is a button that is pushed…

Elena's hysterical laughter is not helping Lachlan to stay in-character. Neither is the whiskey, truthfully, which he does indeed take several gulps from before passing it back. And then he's assaulted with foam! "Argh! Augh! Ack!" He waves his hook in defense, fending off one of the attacks. It's hard to fend off attacks when one is trying not to crack up. "Wait! Wait! We canna go on like this … Ninja-Jack!" And into his jacket goes his hand, which retrieves a rolled up piece of paper. "Here, I bring ye a truce!"

Reaching out a hand Cass attempts to help the floored Elena from her bed. It's not going to be strong lift so much as a hand hold for Elena to pull herself up. And what she watches is a very strange dinner theatre sort of event enfolding in front of her. That's when she finally starts laughing. And it kind of hurts because she's still sore there. "Oh, ow. Ow. Ow." She manages in between giggles. What a week to be off morphine.

She hasn't stopped laughing. Tears are streaming down from her eyes. She can't talk. All she can do is watch and laugh. Elena grabs ahold of Cass's hand, and stands up from the floor. She manages, somehow, to crawl onto a seat on Cass's side. And when Lachlan brings out THE TRUCE PAPER, she drops her head on the mattress, an exclamation that sounds more like a sob than a laugh escaping from her mouth. Yes, guys. You just made her laugh so hard she cried. NICE WORK.

Shit. How do ninjas make peace? Jack pauses in mid-stab. Of his face, his eyes are all that's visible, but they're squinted into an elaborately evil facade. He's carefully avoiding looking at anyone but Lachlan. He's already having enough trouble keeping a straight face. Slowly, he withdraws and tucks his knife away. Then solemnly, he accepts the whiskey and the rolled document. "In the land of my people, men who drink together are brothers for a day. While the sun is high, I shall browse this 'truce' that you carry hitherto. Egregiously. Gregariously? Shit, I'll read it." With all due reverence, he unrolls the paper.

He can't help it: when Cass starts laughing, the twitching corners of Lachlan's mouth pull upward and he lets out a rather suppressed snicker. He quickly covers this by clamping a hand over his mouth and attempting to look thoughtful, but now he just looks like a sporfling pirate who is trying to hide the fact that he's sporfling. He casts a sidelong look at the two dying women, then back at Jack, then he turns his head, lifts his eyepatch, and gives Cass a wink.

Oh man. What /is/ this. Cass is putting a hand over her mouth and trying not to laugh so hard because this is such a strange a silly scene that she is witnessing. The wink gets more of a grin from her because this is quite an elaborate and strange prank (if that's what it is) to be playing. A hand reaches out to be put on Elena's head because /she/ would like to collapse, but as she's already lying in the bed there's not much else she can do.

It looks like the dinner theater was winding down, so Elena straightens up and claps enthusiastically, wiping tears from her eyes still with her gauzy hand. "That….that was -amazing-. My only regret was not having the camera phone on me." Oh hoh, but she does have pictures of Jack in glam-rock gear, something she hasn't shown Cass and Lachlan yet. But that can come later.

That's it for Jack as well. Snorts of laughter are creeping out from under his mask. "Bloody hell," he chuckles. He hangs his head for a moment in a futile attempt to master himself. The peace treaty is tossed aside, revealing that it's an old shopping list for baking cinnamon rolls. When Jack pulls back his hood, his face is flushed and his hair is bunched up into sweaty spikes. After draping the offending hood-mask combo over one shoulder, he grins across at Cass and Elena. "Bein' a ninja in the summertime sucks. Got any o' those lovely ice chips?"

On the door to Cass' room, there is a simple knock. Leaning against the door frame is the wondergeek himself, Gene Kensington. "Hey, heard there was a really nice lady here who decided to pull a Pete and get shot," he says with a weak smile, attempting to be funny and cool.

Of course, Gene slips on the door frame he was leaning against and falls flatly on his face. In the sexiest way possible… If there is one.

Being a pirate isn't /as/ bad as being a ninja in the summer-spring, but it's still pretty hot. Lachlan is all-out grinning now as he strips off the hat and pulls flips the eyepatch up permanently. Freed from his obligations as Captain Deatley, he heads over to the hospital bed. "An' now there's no' gonna be anymore pirates an' ninjas fightin' in yer hospital, a'righ'?" he chuckles, leaning down to give Cass a quick and fond kiss. And then there's Gene. And then there's Gene on the floor. The Scotsman winces a bit. "'Re ye a'righ'?" he asks of the other man, taking a few steps forward as though to help.

Even if the dinner theatre is over, Cass is still laughing slightly. It abates long enough to receive the quick kiss from Captain Deatley and then she beams at NinjaJack. "That was amazing guys." It's her version of a thanks. However, Gene's entrance and slip and fall make her sit up quite quickly. Which hurts. She winces, both in sympathy for Gene and for the pain in her side. "Are you okay?" She looks over to make sure someone is going over to help him up.

She manages to remove herself from the edge of Cass's bed, Elena picking up an ice bucket and filling a glass with it. Walking over, she hands it to Jack in case he wants cold scotch. She doesn't see Gene enter as her back is to the door when he arrives - but at the crash, she whips around, accidentally thwapping Jack's forearm with her injured hand, and she groans. But when she sees who it is, she blinks. "Gene!" she exclaims. "Are you okay?"

Jack gratefully accepts the glass of ice from Elena and pours himself a drink. The groan of pain elicits a raised eyebrow. And then there's a clatter. The Irishman turns around and stoops to peer at Gene. "I imagine he's none the worse for wear. How 'bout you, what'd you do?" The query is punctuated by a wave in the direction of Elena's injured hand as he straightens.
Gene doesn't get up quite yet, but he does offer a thumbs up from his prone position. "It's all good!" he offers from the floor.

Even still, Lachlan arrives at Gene's side and offers a hook — then he rights himself and offers a hand to help the geek up. "Well, ye missed the show. Up ye get." Up up up. Only one person should be hurting in this room.

Unfortunately, there seem to be a lot of people hurting in this room. "Well, I don't know if we're calling getting shot a Pete, yet." She laughs softly. And then she narrows her eyes when she sees Elena's bandaged hand. Unable to actually reach out and grab her herself, she just stares at the woman. Luckily, Jack asks the question that she's thinking and allows her to remain silent. Which she does, but looks over at Elena with a questioning look.

Unfortunately, there seem to be a lot of people hurting in this room. "Well, I don't know if we're calling getting shot a Pete, yet." She laughs softly. And then she narrows her eyes when she sees Elena's bandaged hand. Unable to actually reach out and grab her herself, she just stares at the woman. Luckily, Jack asks the question that she's thinking and allows her to remain silent. Which she does, but looks over at Elena with a questioning look.

"Oh…uh…" Elena glances down at her hand, and looks a little guilty. She had been cheating and using her powers so it wouldn't hurt, but she lost conscious control of it when she had been laughing so hard. Now it throbbed like the dickens. Cradling her hand a bit, she bites on her bottom lip just a touch, watching Jack and Cass's eyes on her. Finally, she winces. "Well……it's funny, really," she says with a sheepish laugh. Only it wasn't. "Um. Dezi's ex-husband decided to visit the apartment. Unannounced." She falls quiet, and then, the story comes out slowly, about how Lance Maddox barged into the apartment, called her a maid and that she spoke English too well for it, and calling Ramon a wetback. "….and then…I couldn't help it. Before I knew it I was punching him in the adam's apple. I don't know -where- it came from either, I'm not that strong but I managed to bring him down. It's just that he was being so -insulting- towards Papa…" Even now she refrains from calling him racist, because he was. But a possible unused aspect of her powers? YAY BOOST. It shall be discovered soon. "I…lost my temper."

The Genius isn't hurt! He's just fine, no matter what people say! Despite his good health, the young man takes the aid offered by Lachlan in order to stand back up. "Show?" he asks with a confused look in his eyes. The talk of Elena distracts him though, but he doesn't offer a word on it, silently listening in.

As Elena relates her story, Jack opens his mouth to interject at several point. No words come out, though. His face goes from pink to reddish to purple in an impressively short span of time. "M. M-m-m. Maid? W-wetback?" Held in front of his body, Jack's hands clench and unclench spasmodically. He takes a slow, deep breath. Though the image of squashing the faceless man who dared to hurt his neice is still strong in his mind, he can't help but smile proudly. "You hit 'im in the throat? That's a good girl."

As with the others in the room, Lachlan listens to the story as it's relayed. After it's over, he doesn't look real thrilled with Dezi's ex-husband. With a grumble, he adds to Jack's sentiment: "Yer actin' like it's a bad thing ye did wha' ye did. S'no' bad at all. Should've punched harder an' made it so he doesna open 'is bloody mouth again." No, he doesn't mean killing necessarily. Just a crushed larynx. Hard to talk without one of those!

Unlike the other two men here, Gene frowns faintly at the mention of her getting violent. After all, while the man deserved it, he expected more from her. Of course, there might be a slim chance Gene might get mad enough to try such a move one day. For the time being, he doubts it, merely moving to put the tacky plastic flowers with sunglasses on the bedside table if there's room.

"Well….." Elena says, rather sheepishly. "He's really tall, I couldn't really reach his face. And I just wanted him to stop talking." Trust the young woman to have pulled off an impressive attack simply because she was shorter than the guy she was squaring off of. She lays a hand on Jack's arm in an effort to calm him, squeezing warmly and affectionately. Lachlan also gets a smile, even if it is somewhat embarassed. "Thanks, Lachlan. So!" She clears her throat and tries to change the topic. "I brought cake!" She gestures to the bedside table where the fresh banana loaf is waiting. "I figured Cass'd like something better than the hospital food, so…"

"Maddox. Lance Maddox. Lance Maddox." Jack murmurs the name to himself several times, committing it to memory. He nods briskly, then sets aside his half-empty pint of whiskey and dusts off his hands. When he pulls away from Elena's grip, he smiles crookedly at the young woman. "Gor, issat banana bread? Does it have nuts? Jack don't eat nuts with his bananas, no ma'am."

Now that Gene's up and not in any major pain, Lachlan feels good enough to head back to the chair next to Cass' bed and seat himself. He removes the fake hook and, since Gene's flowers took up the rest of the room on the table, he hangs it on the safety bar of the bed. Then he proceeds to remove his captain's coat and drapes it over the back of the chair before settling back with a sigh, reaching out to take Cass' hand. "Nah, I'm a'righ' fer now. Lemme catch m'breath from all tha'." He waves a hand toward the door to indicate the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny.

Gene isn't the only one that frowns when she hears about Elena's violence. Cass is not saying that the guy didn't deserve it, but she doesn't like the idea of everyone around her becoming more violent, more willing to throw those punches. She takes Lachlan's hand but reaches out with the other one for some of that banana bread. "You're a savior, Miss Tyson." The tacky plastic flowers distract her, too. "Hey, those are interesting. What /are/ they?"

"No, no nuts - I don't like them on banana loaf either," Elena tells Jack with a grin, but she moves over to the bedside, passing out napkins to those who want some, and handing out slices, one a piece, including one for herself. Most of it, however, is for Cass. She does duck her head at the frowns from Gene and Cass though. She isn't -too- proud of what she did, in fact she felt bad….guiltily however, she felt bad because she knew decking her ex-husband probably upset Dezi a little. Maybe.

Smiling crookedly, Jack pads over to Cass's bedside and lays a hand on her shoulder briefly. "It's good to see you on the mend, lady-o." The solemn sentiment would be heartwarming if Jack weren't still mostly dressed in ninja attire. Treat in hand, he ruffles Elena's hair affectionately on his way out the door. "You kids be good. I've gotta get back to the Den."

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