2007-07-21: If You Should Want An Axe



Summary: Jane buys a copy of the New York Times from Amy the neighborhood newspaper vendor and reacts to what she reads.

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Date It Happened: July 21st, 2007

If You Should Want An Axe

Greenwich Village , Manhattan, NYC

Ten o' clock approaches, a Monday morning and for most the start to a fresh workweek. The instrument and backpack carrying brunette doesn't so much fit in with that category, not having set working hours to keep, although she is on her way to do what earns her income. Jane has a session to play at Cutting Room Studios today, and sessions with her band after that. Today, as she heads toward the newspaper vendor with a twenty ounce bottle of Pepsi in her left hand, she's garbed herself in a black shirt with Led Zeppelin's logo across the front over a pair of dark blue shorts and athletic shoes.

The first flush of customers has long since come and gone, the multitude of people who stop by for reading material during the morning commute. The ones who read on their lunch break have yet to arrive. At present, the vendor is sitting down behind her booth, reading one of her own magazines - but not without keeping a sharp eye out for potential customers, never that. Black curls shake slightly at a less visible motion of her head, dark eyes watching Jane's approach over the top of the periodical. "'Bout time you showed up," she calls to the musician. "I've got a paper with your name on it, but I was afraid I'd run out and have to sell it before you got here!"

The approaching musician chuckles slightly at the greeting and pulls out some cash from a pocket to pay for the publication. "Thanks, Amy," Jane replies in a bit of a droll voice. "What's the headline today, more poll numbers and mudslinging about the Petrelli and Crane campaigns?" This topic seems to interest her most about current news. "I think Dr. Petrelli will crush him come November." While speaking, her eyes are starting to survey the periodicals also offered here. most notably the music magazines. Rolling Stone, Spin, and more local offerings. "Business was really good for you today, it seems."

The paper in question is handed over in exchange for the cash, which Amy makes vanish as if it never existed to begin with. Practical sleight-of-hand. "You're most welcome. Ah, you'll have to resign yourself to disappointment on that score. Our beloved politicians have been shunted below the fold today." Note the slight but definite sarcasm on select words. The woman leans on the booth counter and grins at Jane. "Mind you, I don't think they've noticed. Too busy throwing the muck around." Watching Jane contemplate the magazines, she shakes her head - but the grin doesn't so much as fade. "For a given value of 'good', maybe - still got plenty more to get rid of. Care to assist?"

Taking the paper, she's starting to read it. Jane's eyes skim the front page and peruse the area below the fold. Him again. Her expression takes on a wistfulness as Jaden's image is sighted. Her head shakes a time or two as she murmurs "You nut. And of course you're into the costume thing still." Her eyes lift from the print and another remark is made. "Henry the Eighth fits. Thank God for modern times. otherwise the clown would've had me framed and beheaded."

In response to that, Amy snorts. "Kid probably wouldn't have the attention span to make it happen. Assuming the thought did anything more than blow in one ear and out the other." Clearly, her opinion of Jaden isn't high — but that's the flipside of fame. "No offense meant, of course," she continues in short order, just in case Jane should get to feeling defensive on Jaden's behalf. "Have to admit, beheading also doesn't seem his style. Doesn't fit with the rest of the publicity stunts."

A quiet snicker escapes at Amy's comment on his attention span. "It's hard to stay angry with him, even though it still hurts. Beheading might not be his style, but he certainly knows how to cast aside women and shatter hearts like Henry Eight." Her eyes lower to the paper again and linger on the costumed persons in the background. A murmur passes Jane's lips along with the forming of a sympathetic expression. "Oh, Elena, the things you go through just to earn a living from that guy. Keep your head up, chica."

"It's a male trait," Amy proclaims, tilting her head to catch a glimpse of the picture Jane's looking at. Not that she /needs/ to see it. "Every guy can do it. This is a fact." The vendor falls quiet for a brief moment, considering Jane and her paper. "The vultures -" Meaning the reporters, of course. "- have already pegged her as his next girlfriend. Not that they need /any/ encouragement to start matchmaking, especially when they can hang titles like 'queen-to-be' on their targets. Think there's any truth to that, or are they totally off base… again?"

While listening to Amy, her eyes are on the part of page one where the Chairman of the newly merged company's Board is announced, and a quiet smile shows on her features. "Congrats, Senor Gomez." For whatever reason, she doesn't seem to have skepticism about the choice. In her mind, Jaden seems to have gotten something right. When Jane looks up again. her eyes are wide. "New girlfriend, her? the one in the Renaissance getup in the picture?" She snorts derisively. "He wishes." And on she goes to check out the society pages and see whatever might be found there on that topic.

Amy is, of course, taking in all of Jane's remarks and filing them away for later gossip. Cupping her chin in her hands, she chuckles at Jane's reaction. "She /did/ seem likely to start making heads roll if the reporters press the issue. And you know they will." The woman grins broadly. "Wouldn't mind seeing that, myself."

"I guess you already read whatever I'm about to see, didn't you, Amy? That's…" Suddenly Jane's eyes light up as they fix on Amy's face. It's like one of those cartoon moments when the light bulb switches on by someone's head to mean they just got whatever's there to be got. "That's why you saved the paper, so you could watch me find all this." Her eyes roll. "Woman, you're just evil!"

But like a train wreck, she just can't look away. Flip, flip, flip, flip… she's leafing quickly through to the appropriate section and stopping when she gets there. Tango picture of Jaden and Elena. Queen to be? The quote of 'What!?' causes her to laugh and show a very approving smile. "Good for you, chica! You know the Clown would just be bedding blonde twins two weeks later."

Straightening, Amy mimes a melodramatic stab to the heart. "You cut me to the quick! Such a /suspicious/ mind you have." Grinning all the while, she returns to leaning against the booth. "Don't I have a paper for you /every/ day? Is that not worth /any/ credit in Jane's book?"

"Well, yes," the musician admits with a laugh. "But the timing of it, you gotta admit, looks funky. Nice acting. You could win the Oscar." Jane's eyes go back to the page and read over the society article again more slowly. Part of the way through she stops and blinks. Then blinks again. "Explosive breakup! Christ, these vultures make it sound like I flipped out when I caught him cheating, grabbed an axe, and tried to dismantle his house!"

Anger is building as she reads on. "Headliner of latest project, Jane and the Pussycats?! I… I…" She stammers, it takes her some seconds to reclaim ability of forming coherent words. "He mentioned it, but I never said I'd actually do it! Ohmygod, Anastasia, Amanda and Mark are gonna kill me! They'll think I signed them on for this." The mouth remains open, for a stretch of several seconds it looks like she might scream. But she doesn't. Her jaw sets, there's fire in her eyes. "It'd be a cold day in hell before I do anything costumey for that man!"

"Why, thank you. I'll be here same-time tomorrow," Amy replies instantly, deadpan. She straightens up again as Jane clearly starts to get riled, dark brows lifting. "Axes and explosions sell papers," she points out. "You know that's all they want out of whatever they think's going on." She eyes Jane sidelong, forehead creasing, when the woman doesn't quite scream. "If you should /want/ an axe, by any chance…" is her subsequent droll statement.

"Oh, it's tempting," Jane replies with a still stormy expression. She is, at least seemingly, starting to calm a bit. "But not quite my style." If she were to take vengeance, it would more likely be with her voice against any glass item he owns. And the belongings of some reporters too. Her eyes close while she continues recovering composure, and after a stretch of quiet intones wistfully "I've had exes before, and moved on, got over it. But this one, each time I think I'm turning a corner, there he is. All over the papers." All over the papers, with his apparent attempts to hook up with one of her closest friends printed for all the world to read in the New York Times.

"See you tomorrow, Amy," the musician offers. "I'll bring scissors and darts. We can make his face a target," she quips, while bracing herself for the possible wrath of Anastasia, Amanda, and Mark.

"You're on," the vendor agrees. "There's certainly plenty of pictures to choose from. You take care of yourself, all right?" she calls after the woman.

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