2009-11-29: It's Nerf or Nothin'



Date: November 29, 2009


A strange game leads to Jaden learning a little bit more about Hallis. Oh, and Hallis spends money.

"It's Nerf or Nothin'"

NYC - EvoSoft Tower

Being on call 24/7 makes for a strange work week, especially being called to EvoSoft Tower on a Sunday afternoon. Never the less, Hallis gets out of the cab, a small package under her arm and heads toward the doors. She bypasses security easily enough, flashing her name badge and signing the sheet for after hours visitors. After the incidentals have been taken care of, she races toward the elevator and pushes the button seven or either times to summon the speedy box to the bottom floor.

Now, one shouldn't wonder at all why the elevator muzak is orchestrated cartoon theme songs, it's Evosoft. Almost subconsciously, Hallis finds herself humming along to the theme from Scooby Doo, one of the only cartoons she knows. When the contraption finally reaches the top floor of the high rise, the young blonde steps out and clips toward her boss' office holding the package in both hands.

Knock Knock, the quick rap is the only announcement that she's there and the socialite doesn't wait to be invited before barging into the office. "I got them Jaden, but do you know how hard it was to find lederhosen in this size on a Sunday?" Then she opens a package to reveal an enormous pair of leather shorts and the suspenders to go with them.

Jaden Cain and all of his craziness is doing nothing at all that's even close to being important in his office. In fact, he's just shooting Nerf darts at random targets around the office. Some of them are celebrity faces and the others are just random objects. He's not really having too much fun with this, it seems like, considering that he's not even diving behind the desk and such. "So you got it? Jawsome. I knew I spotted the best damn mystery shopper in all of New York that day." Jaden cracks a bit of a smile, before shooting his last dart and connecting it to the forehead of George Clooney. "Worst. Batman. Ever." is muttered, before he twirls the gun on his finger and holds it out towards Hallis. "Reload me."

"Yessir!" Hallis salutes, grabbing the gun and racing around the office to gather the darts. The skirt she is wearing isn't condusive to any sort of bending, so she eases her figure down rather awkwardly to pick up the little foam pieces. She moves a little slowly on her way back to the desk, this could be due to the fact that she's trying to figure out exactly how to fit the darts into little plastic gun. "So… what are you going to do with those? Are they for the security guard downstairs? Because I noticed that they're kind of his size." Then her face drops into a shocked expression, "Is tomorrow wear leather to work day? Because I have this great outfit!" Then she casts a quick glance to the short and wrinkles her nose, "It's a bit too shiny to match those things though…"

"Leather?" Jaden actually laughs a bit upon hearing that, considering that for a bit. "Y'know, maybe I should get rid of this whole Dress Code thing. What do you think?" Jaden's actually asking the opinion of one of the low people on the totem pole. It's definitely going to be an interesting conversation, now isn't it? "I mean, if we didn't have the lenient dress code we already have… what would /you/ wear to work?" Jaden scoops up a pencil and starts tossing it from hand to hand, before his fingertips miss and it goes flying to the floor and rolls off in some random direction. Oops.

After finally figuring out how to fit the darts into the gun, Hallis looks over to where the pencil was tossed and then looks back at her boss. He didn't exactly ask her to get it, but he was using it and now it's out of reach. So, without being ordered to, Hallis crosses the room and twists her small frame to the side, bending her knees and reaching for the pencil. This is all well and good to get down to where the little wooden writing implement is, but getting back up poses another problem. "Uhm… no dress code? Well I guess that's good, but do you really want people to come to work in their pajamas or something?" The thought of some of the people she's seen in the building wearing nothing but their boxers sends a little shiver up Hallis' spine. "What about changing it to something like… 'Not Naked'?" Giving up, she rolls forward onto her knees and pushes herself up off the floor and to a stand. A moment later, the pencil is laid on the desk near Jaden and Hallis is making herself comfortable by sitting on his desk.

Mr. Cain is reaching out to take the gun and then he's aiming the darts off in a random direction. He doesn't even pull the trigger yet. There's no reason to. He's still trying to find something awesome or worthy to shoot at. That's for sure. "Good call. We don't want Big Reggie in Accounting coming to work in a speedo." Jaden shudders at that thought, because he's actually seen Big Reg in a speedo. It was not a pretty sight. Not in the least. "Or maybe I can do a female only dress code. That way I can have something to look at while I'm busy doing mountains and mountains of boring paperwork." Much like the paperwork that's been hidden off on the file cabinet behind his desk. Oh the dodging of work. And finally, the dart is shot at the pen holder on the desk, knocking it over and spilling pens all over the floor.

Giving her boss an incredulous look, Hallis dutifully slides off the desk and begins the slow work of picking the pens up off the floor. This time, she doesn't bother trying to be genteel about it, she just bends over and picks the pens up one by one and drops them back into the holder. "Female only dress code, isn't that kind of sexist? I think you could get sued for that." Soon the woman is on her hands and knees and crawling to get the last few remaining pens, one of which is over by the large ficus in the corner. One of her hands reaches behind her thigh and pulls down her skirt, avoiding any gratuitous underwear glimpses.

"Hrm. Getting sued. I heard that's not good for the business. Guess you're right. Again. Man, you're pretty good at this company running stuff." Jaden's shrugging again, as another one of his ideas gets shot down. He's really not liking this whole having to actually worry about things like getting sued. He's richer than everyone. He should automatically get a free pass or something. But alas, he's not going to. However, the moment he spots a more excellent target, he grins and brings the weapon up in the classic action hero style. And then he's taking aim. "I mean. Honestly. What's the deal with 'sexism', anyway? What's wrong with wanting a woman to look amazing?" And then he fires. Rapid fire. Multiple darts flying off towards the cute little target near the ficus!

"Hey!!" Hallis practically roars as she tries to get out of the line of fire. This ends with her ducks down on the other side of his desk. "I'm going to use my expense account to get a bigger gun and shoot at you!" She grumps, still hiding from the foam projectiles. "And I'm not reloading!" In the ruckus, the young socialite seems to have torn a one inch slit in the seam of her skirt. This causes her just a little bit of distress and she peeks above the 'horizon' to peer at Jaden. Eying him carefully, she picks up the phone on his desk and reaches across to punch in the numbers 4-1-1. "Hello, operator? I need to be connected to Saks Fifth Avenue, ladies department."

Jaden kicks open his desk drawer… which is full of Nerf guns. He takes out a couple of those things and slides one under his desk and then he's dropping down to get behind it. "There. Don't say I never gave you anything." And he's cocking the Nerf gun to prepare for battle. "You may be better at Radmobile. But I'm an action hero when it comes to Nerf." And then he's popping up and leaping off towards the sofa, firing off a couple of Nerf darts in the direction of the phone using assistant, while his body works on crashing to the floor behind the sofa for more cover!

"Hello? I need a black skirt— AAAAHHH!!" Hallis shrieks as she's pummeled by another barrage of darts and she scrambles around the desk to hide in the leg cubby of the large wooden piece of furniture. The poor sales clerk on the other end is just left to wonder what is happening on their end of the phone line. Heavy breathing now, that is what she's being treated to. Slowly, the young blonde whispers into the receiver. "Hello? Sorry about that, I'm trying to avoid getting shot." Pause. "I need a little black skirt charge it to my account, Hallis Van Cortlandt… and I need it delivered to the EvoSoft building." Pause. "Actually, just pick me out a whole outfit and I need some shoes to go with it. Jamie that works there knows what I like. I have to go now, just have it here soon please? I'm all ripped up." Then a solitary hand reaches into Jaden's eye line and fumbles to hang up the phone. "I hope you like them apples, Jaden. I just got a really expensive outfit on my expense account!" Then she grabs two guns and stands up from her hidden position, firing at everything and nothing.

It's good that she has the desk, because it has the drawer full of guns. He's stuck with whatever darts he can find on the floor. Alas, Hallis is a terrible shot, and that means she runs through those two guns in almost no time, giving him plenty of ammo.

Everything and Nothing is what Hallis gets to hit. Because Jaden is popping up from behind the ficus in a matter of seconds. Which means there's a couple of darts headed from that direction. "First rule of spending Jaden Cain's money? Don't worry about it. It's Jaden Cain's money!" But then he's no longer at the ficus plant, because he's popping up from the behind the sofa to shoot off a couple more darts. "Not to mention the fact that, well, I'm so rich that spending money doesn't even count as spending money!" And then Jaden's ducking back down behind the sofa. This is followed up by Jaden popping up from just in front of the desk, for a close range shot at Hallis' forehead. Slow motion shot! And then he's ducking back down in front of the desk, just in time to pop up behind Hallis and plant one of those pistols to the back of her head. "Say it." SAY WHAT?! WHAT COULD HE POSSIBLY MEAN?

"I give up! You're a better action hero!!" The young woman cries out, dropping her guns and raising her hands in surrender. She's on her knees and flabbergasted at how her boss could move so fast. Turning her head to peer at him, she raises her eyebrows and gives him a winning smile. "Truce? My skirt ripped again and I'm scared that I'm going to have nothing on if we keep this up." Of course, she waits for his reply, she doesn't want to risk another round of nerf darting so soon, and she's really not dressed for it. Mental note for next time? Don't wear stilettos and short skirts to the office.

Jaden is not about to let her get away without saying it. Not if she… oh never mind. "Oh, I can't believe this You don't even know the phrase?" Jaden sighs and drops the pistol. before turning to look off in some other direction. Walking off towards the sofa so that he can sit down. "You've never seen the Nerf commercials from the 80s?" He's already reaching for his laptop and pulling the top up so that he can find some examples on the You of Tube. "You poor deprived pretty girl." is uttered without even the inkling that could be sexual harassment.

Hallis gets up and tries to pull her skirt down enough so that her entire thigh doesn't show. "What's the phrase?" Not wondering what it could do to the fabric, she grabs Jaden's stapler and begins to make haphazard repairs to the skirt she's in, hoping it will hold until her delivery arrives. After the mission has been completed, she meanders over to the sofa and perches on the arm closest to her boss, peering over at the screen in front of him. "I didn't watch much television, we only had an hour every day to do what we wanted. I didn't waste my time."

"You poor thing. No television? What kind of evil bastard parents do you have?" Jaden is already thinking about going forth and teaching her parents a few things. He goes into Youtube and types in the classic Nerf Or Nothin' commercials. They load super fast on the EvoSoft Laptop. He loves being a corporate badass. "Here. Check these out. And next time, when I totally own you in Nerf Wars, you'll know what to say." He grins and offers the laptop to Hallis, whilst he gets himself back up to his feet and starts off towards his desk again.

Hallis slides into the corner of the sofa as she watches the commercial on the little computer. "Nerf or nothing? Are you serious? You want me to say that?" Jaden is treated to a rather confused expression, "Nerf or nothing… That's just silly Jaden, really." She closes the laptop and sets it down beside her, stretching her arms up and cupping her hands behind her head. "And it wasn't my parents, I went to boarding school all my life. They had too many rules." Never mind the fact that once she hit her teens, all those rules were broken.

"School? What is this school you speak of?" Jaden cracks a smile and gets back to being comfortable in his chair, whilst clearing random darts off his desk. He's just about tired of seeing them all over the place. "Hey. Can you collect these? I've got a meeting in about an hour and I have to look responsible." He makes a little pouty face, even though he's pretty sure that she's going to pick them up anyway. Since it happens to be her job or something. "But I get what you're sayin'. I was never that good the whole school thing myself. Only reason I even graduate high school was because I talked my way out of flunking debate class."

"And now look at you. You're the richest man in the world and I'm a sponge picker." Hallis smirks as she bends down to collect the yellow toys from the floor. They're everywhere. Making another mental note, the socialite vows to perfect her aim. He's much better at this than she is, maybe it's the pants. "Is this going to be an every day thing?" The young blonde quips as she opens the drawer next to him and dumps a load of darts into it. "Because I think I'm going to start wearing pants to work. This skirt thing doesn't work so well for Nerf Wars."

Jaden sighs. And then he's pouting. Mostly because he can't believe that she just said that. "I can't believe you just said that." See? "You are officially banned from wearing anything but skirts to work! This is totally an unofficial rule so you can't sue me. But if you hide those legs, I will be a very, very, sad puppy."

Sliding the drawer closed with her foot, Hallis just grins at him and shakes her head. "I wouldn't sue you Jaden, trust me. You gave me my first job, I completely owe you." Then she's up on his desk again, crossing her legs one over the other. "Speaking of the job…." She stretches one of them out and points her toe toward the window. "Do I get any days off? Or do I come in all the time? Is it just to the office or will I have to go to your apartment or wherever you live? I don't have to deliver underwear or anything, do I?"

"No, no underwear. I wouldn't want you boyfriend coming to try and kill me in my sleep. That happens enough as it is." Whether or not he's joking is hard to tell. But then again, he's trying to keep this conversation as light as he possibly can. That's just the way he does business. Or something like it. "Hey. Word to the wise. Don't ever tell somebody like me that you owe him. You might end up in a chicken suit and wonder why." He smirks, his own thoughts going back to his eternal crush and he sighs. Miss her.

"You have lots of boyfriends trying to kill you in your sleep?" Hallis says idly, swinging her legs back and forth. "You know what that means, right? You need to find better girlfriends." She jumps off the desk as his phone rings, racing to answer it before he does. "Really? Oh… Well that's nice, send them right up." The receiver is placed back in its cradle and she gives a quick smile to the boss. "Those are my clothes, I'll see you later then?" And with a wave, she flits to the door, "Unless… you need something else?"

"Nah. You're free to go. Thanks for playing, by the way. Even if you do suck." Jaden flashes a grin and gives the girl a bit of a finger wave. "And y'know what, take a couple days off. You deserve it. Just when you come back… come back ready." And that's when Jaden pulls out another Nerf pistol. "Remember. It's Nerf or Nothin'." And then he's taking aim and firing one last dart!

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