Nathan's First Dark Future

Starring:

NATHAN, ADRENALINE, AND THE CRUSHER OF DREAMS MELATONIN

Summary: Nathan submits his DF. It all just spirals out of control.

Dark Future Date: 28th of April, 2008

Nathan's First Dark Future


The Job Queue

~ Nathan's Dark Future ~
Category: DFTP ~~~ Priority: MEDIUM
Submitted By: Nathan ~~~ Handled By:
Submit Date: 04/28/08
Due Date: 05/03/08 ~~~ Status: NEW

Description:
Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit tight mates
I'll tell you how I became the President of the United Fucking States

In New York City, born and raised
Campaigning for congress was how I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And lying about the values of healthcare and schools
Then my brother walked in
He was up to no good
He was overloading on powers to blow up the neighborhood
I managed to save the world but I got all burned up
'Til my daughter came along and somethingthatrhymneswith'up'.

So I drank and commited adultery day after day
But I grew an alter ego who said 'NO WAY'
He took over and joined forces with his bee-bee-eff
Got elected to Prez before you could say double-u-tee-eff

Evolved superiority? Yo this is bad
More opression and violence the world's ever had
All humans living in detainment and strife,
Except for maybe Momo, and my wife!

…except not because she was locked up too!
Logan put her in a cab and said 'Yo homes smell ya later!'
So here I am,
It kind of grates,
That my evil alter ego is President of the United Fucking States.

(I'll do the real thing later. Promise. m3.)

Comments:

Adrenaline - Mon Apr 28 19:47:38 2008
I APPROVE OF THIS GREATLY.

Histamine - Mon Apr 28 20:01:31 2008
Oh. My. Word.

Adrenaline - Mon Apr 28 20:19:18 2008
MARRY ME. WHO'S WHIPPED NOW.

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:20:42 2008
YES. <3

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:22:00 2008
:(

Adrenaline - Mon Apr 28 20:22:46 2008
Ma femme objects to this, I think. I'm afraid I'm going to have to call it off. (But I am not whipped.)

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:23:45 2008
Sure. I understand. (WHI-psssh. WHI-psssh. Totally not whipped.)

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:24:35 2008
(WHI-psssh? Have you ever even HEARD a whip? I was GOING to approve this job, minus the wedding, but now I think I've lost total respect for you.)

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:25:32 2008
I. I. YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO TYPE WHIP SOUNDS? JEEZE.

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:26:29 2008
WELL, FIGURE IT OUT. GOD. YOU CAN'T BE PRESIDENT UNLESS YOU KNOW HOW TO TYPE WHIP SOUNDS.

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:27:34 2008
I like ponies.

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:28:42 2008
DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT, MISTER PETRELLI.

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:29:57 2008
I DIDN'T— IT— YOU— I DO NOT OMG YOU'RE CHEATING WTF IS GOIN ON. NO PONIES IN HEROES.

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:30:20 2008
Only horses. WILD ONES.

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:31:16 2008
My Wild Horses still say I'm awesome.

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:31:56 2008
Your wild horses don't matter! They're LAME!

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:32:47 2008
…you break my heart, Miss Crusher of Dreams. I quit.QUIT

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:32:53 2008
lol enter key is stuck

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:35:56 2008
I'll quit /you./ No one calls me Miss Crusher of Dreams and lives to tell the tale. >(

Nathan - Mon Apr 28 20:38:51 2008
WHATEVER. I'ma taking my doggy and my WHI-psssh. BUH-BYE.

Melatonin - Mon Apr 28 20:40:48 2008
See you in the next life, GUY WHO WILL NEVER BE PRESIDENT! >(

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