2007-07-02: Sexytiems Interrupted


Cass_icon.gif Jack_icon.gif Lachlan_icon.gif


Cass tries to spring [SURPRISE SEXYTIEMS] on Lachlan and winds up accidentally springing them on Jack instead. Lots of awkwardness follows, but it's pretty much impossible to derail Lachlan's libido anyway.

Date It Happened: July 2nd, 2007

Sexytiems Interrupted

Cass' Apartment, Brooklyn

VROOOM! A purple Pontiac GTO cuts the nearest corner a little too sharply, barely clipping the curb and bouncing it a bit as it screeches untidily into a parking spot. When Jack climbs out of the driver's seat, he's looking a little concerned. Lost in thought, even. While the idea of he and Trina going on a double date with Lachlan and Cass has promise, it also has the potential to be an unmitigated disaster. So he's here to talk to Cass and make sure that a movie and drinks isn't going to end up getting him couched for a week at Trina's.

He slips through the front door he takes the steps two at a time, whistling tunelessly under his breath all the way down the hall. When he reaches the door to Cass' place he raps lightly with two knuckles.

When Cass told Lachlan 'soon' for when she'd be all better and ready to go, what she didn't tell him was /how/ soon. Because that's the part of the surprise. In fact, she's taken most of the day to get things all ready for this surprise. Kerchiefs have been tossed over lamps to give it a dimmer glow and she already has a (new) bottle of scotch all ready. But the real surprise is what she's wearing. Or not wearing. That would be a lot of clothes. What she /is/ wearing, though, is a black lacy bra that is mostly sheer except for covering the choice pars. Also, knee high tights complete with garter ties and a very very short ruffled skirt that just barely covers everything. She's laying in a suggestive position and has no idea that someone's about to drop in for a surprise visit. In fact, she's almost positive that it's Lachlan and she grins through her dark red lipstick.

"Come on in, baby," she calls out, trying to keep it as normal as possible. The surprise springs at the last moment. Unfortunately.

Baby? Jack's mouth quirks curiously, then he shrugs. There are worse things to be called by a pretty lady, after all. He turns the knob and strides in, chuckling as he does. "Baby? Didn't know we were on such good—BOOBIES!" The door is left hanging open. Jack's jaw drops and his eyes bug out cartoonishly. "It's… With the buttcheeks. And the ladybits." He cocks his head to the side and points both index fingers at Cass, desperately trying to make sense of the situation.

"JACK?!" Cass immediately sits up from her sexy pose to something that crosses her arms over her chest. But that doesn't help the bottom half. Grabbing the pillow that she was laying on, she quickly puts it on her lap. There. That's…well, it's something. "Oh Jesus. I thought you were /Lachlan/!" she starts accusingly. "And don't talk about my buttcheeks! As if they're something you're familiar with!" Oh God, this is a nightmare. "I was. It's just. Oh God. What are you /doing/ here, Jack?"

When Cass says the word buttcheeks, Jack yanks his eyes away from general region of said parts. Unfortunately, nowhere he looks is particularly safe. Thoroughly blushing and precariously close to panicking, he settles on the only part of Cass he's accustomed to seeing. Her face. Unfortunately, this means he has to look her in the eye when he says, "OHGOD! It was an accident! I don't know your buttcheeks, I swear!"

"Stop saying buttcheeks!" Cass is blushing just as much at this situation. "That…it's /not helping/." This is such a bad situation. Taking the two couch pillows, she uses them to cover herself more completely so when she stands up it's not giving Jack a full show. That makes things a little easier for her. Now she doesn't feel so naked in front of her friend. "What…what can I do for you, Jack?"

"UH!" Jack has a sudden flash of insight and turns the fuck around. "D-d. D-d-d. Date!" No, Cass. Not a date with you. "Double date! I came to talk about it!" He sucks in a deep, calming breath and continues at a more humane volume. "Uh. Drinks and a movie? Bring plenty o' clothes?"

"/What/?!" Cass lets escape before Jack clarifies. It's already awkward enough that he basically already saw the good bits but now he's asking her about a date? Then, he continues and she lets a relieved breath escape. "Oh. Oh! Right. Yes. Clothes. I..I like clothes. I think…I think I'm going to go get a bathrobe. STAY TURNED AROUND." She trusts that he will, but she needs to say it for her own sanity. Letting the pillows back down on the couch, she stands up and starts for her room so that she can get something to put on.

As if things weren't awkward enough, there's the jingle of keys on the other side of the door and then the knob turns. With the shrieking violin ambiance of the theme from Psycho, the door pushes open in slow-motion and in steps the Scotsman who started it all. "Hey, baby?" But once he's looked up and taken in everything, Lachlan balks. And stares. His gaze snaps from Cass to Jack and Jack to Cass, and each one sends crazily mixed signals. Cass = OMG SEXYTIEMS?! OMG OMG OMG SEX. Jack = DO NOT WANT SEXYTIEMS OMFG WTF. And then the wheels start turning. Half-naked, sexily clad female in the same room as a male = CHEATING SEXYTIEMS. Shock quickly changes into bewildered anger. "Wha' the bloody fuck's goin' on?!" demands the Scot.

This is bad. This is so very, extremely, and completely bad. Jack holds both hands high above his head like he's just been stopped by the police. "I didn't mean to look!" he cries defensively. "She told me to come in and I wanted to talk about a movie but she was all on the couch and…" Jack pauses to tuck his hands behind his head and make an exaggerated sexy-face. "…dear God what the hell?"

"Oh for the love of…" Cass is halfway to getting her bathrobe when the angry Scotsman comes in. "/Did we not have this conversation before/?!" The one where she would never cheat on him. "I thought he was /you/ coming in. That's why I was being sexy like! This was supposed to be your surprise!" Oh God, this is not working out right. She just puts her head in her hands and says in an almost pouting voice, "I even got you scotch." But nooooo, Jack ruined it.

Jack wanted to talk about a movie and Cass met him sexily?! MORE CHEATING SEXYTIEMS?! But Cass conveniently interjects, and Lachlan is once again forced to simply stare between them both. Anger and confusion quickly starts to turn into devastation. This was supposed to be his SEXYTIEMS, and … and she even got him scotch. And … but … but …

Lachlan starts to smile. And then he starts to grin. Soon he's covering his mouth with one hand and sniggering behind it. "Aw fuck." Snickersnerk.

Now reassured that he's not about to get punched, Jack shakes his head and lets out a chuckle of his own. "Sorry, man. Just… Jesus." He waves both hands helplessly. "Anyway, Transformers is comin' out. I figure we'll watch some shit blow up on this double date we got roped into. S'all I came here to say. Laters." He tips a brief salute to Lachlan. "Cass, good seein' you." As soon as the words leave his lips, he cringes. Shoulders slumped and forehead pinches into an unpleasant frown, he heads for the door.

Now annoyed rather than upset, Cass glares at Lachlan. "Why is it that you /always/ jump to the conclusion that I'm going to sleep with someone else?" Sighing, she just doesn't care that she's barely wearing anything any more. They've both seen everything that was going to be seen. "Transformers. Yes. I'd be fine with that. It was….uh…awkward. I'll talk to you more seriously about this when I have more clothes on." Which would make things much better.

Still trying not to laugh at the entire situation (hell, it really is funny), Lachlan bites his tongue hard and nods, pulling his face into a more serious expression (except the corners of his lips keep twitching). "Sure, yeah. We'll, uh, talk 'bout it later. Take care, Jack." And once the Irishman's gone, he turns back to Cass. "Aw c'mon, baby. 'F ye'd walked in on me in somethin' like this, ye'd've though' the same thing." He takes a look around the place, frowning some. "Jesus, ye really did a number here." He says with obvious disappointment. Damn it, Jack.

Once Jack is gone, Cass sighs and moves for the couch again. "It's /Jack/, Lachlan. I'd never cheat on you with Jack. I mean, I had a stupid crush on him when we first met, but that was way before I ever met you." That /may/ not be helping, but in her mind, it makes it so that he knows that it's not there any more. "Well. Surprise! This was /supposed/ to be your surprise. It didn't exactly work out like I planned it."

Wait, what? What? Lachlan's expression becomes one of shock. "Ye had a crush on Jack?" No, see, that just makes it worse. (Because Lachlan totally did not ever hit on Elena or Eliana and he definitely didn't sleep with the latter.) Well, okay, it makes it worse for a little while, but Cass has more than adequately proved that she is loyal and that she really does love him. He can trust in that. The fact that she went through all this trouble to set up this is definitely proof of that. He glances around again with a frown, then crosses his arms over his chest and rolls his shoulders, finally able to take the time to really look at Cass. Mmmm. Smirk. "Well, uh, I can go out an' come back in an' we can try it again?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, he's Jack. But he was dating Eliana, so that cooled pretty quick." Cass definitely doesn't mean to make any situation worse for Lachlan. Because she is loyal and means it when she says that she would never cheat on him. Dressing up like this and making sure things are special definitely should show that. And if not, well, the grin that she gives him to his question should help with that. "A do over, huh?" Leaning back on the couch, she raises her eyebrow in what she hopes is an evocative sort of manner. "I could be persuaded into that." Then, she lets a giggle slip. "Go go!"

YES! Lachlan grins broadly and bounds back out the door again, closing it enthusiastically behind himself. Haha! SEXYTIEMS. He's getting them. Finally. After a moment to compose himself from Giddy Happy Horny Schoolboy to Clueless Participant In Sexy Surprise, he clears his throat, grows serious, and then knocks on the door. Knocknocknock. SEX PLZ?

While the surprise is no longer there, at least Lachlan can appreciate the sentiment. Or, well, he's probably just happy that he's going to have sex. Either way, everybody wins. Arranging herself on the couch like she was before Jack interrupted, she stretches out. Then, when ready, she calls out, "Come in," in her best coy voice.

Oh yes, Lachlan is /definitely/ happy that he's going to get sex. As mentioned, this is the longest he's ever gone without it in his adult life, and for a man such as himself, that's something akin to pissing in the holy water: utter blasphemy. Doing his best Clueless Participant in Sexy Surprise impersonation, he opens the door and utters a, "Hey, baby" in the usual casual manner. But then he sees Cass again and beams. "Jesus." Hi, Cass.

While blasphemy, Cass also recognizes what a sacrifice it has been for him to go this long without it. And he did it for her and because of her injuries. That's part of the reason for the big show and surprise for him. It's a reward! Even if the sex would have been good enough. Despite the fact that Lachlan is doing a good job at playing dumb as what is to come next, Cass can't help but grin. It kind of ruins the sexy pose, but it also adds to it. "C'mere." With a crook of her finger she gestures for him to join her on the couch.

He doesn't need to be asked twice. Grinning wider, Lachlan bounds over to the couch and almost pounces on it next to Cass. Well … slightly over Cass. But still. "So I'm guessin' yer feelin' better?" Uh. Duh. She definitely looks better. And it's taking some major willpower not to just rip off what's left of the clothing and get to the good part.

"Mmhmm." When Lachlan settles - pounces - onto the couch, she grins and wraps her arms around her neck. Both looking and feeling better, there's no wincing as she picks her head up to give Lachlan a good solid kiss. Talking time is over.

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