2010-03-27: SQUEE!

Starring:

Janet_V4icon.pngParker_V4icon.png

Date: March 27, 2010

Summary:

A friend pays Janet a visit.


"SQUEE!"

Janet's Apartment — NYC

"But my darling, what about Paris?"

"Don't do it, Courtney!! Just don't do it!!" Janet's voice calls from the kitchen to the rest of the, otherwise empty, apartment. Yes, Janet, is yelling at the television. One of her smut-like television shows is on. She's been avoiding Afterlife since Erin's 'death' and is searching for a new story to get involved in and yell at the screen for.

It's late Saturday afternoon, but Janet has opted to stay home today. That is, after running countless errands — which ensured she get ready for her day… although judging from her clothes, this isn't the case. Dressed in a pair of black yoga capris and a magenta hoodie, the brunette pads in from the kitchen with a homemade avacado masque caked on her face, and a giant bowl of popcorn tucked under her arm. Her lips are stiffened (smiling will cause INSTANT wrinkles — very bad!) and so she pops a single kernel of popcorn between her lips before settling on the couch to 'catch up on her stories.'

All's well in the land of smut — as well as things ever get in soap operas — until there's a sharp knock on Courtney's door. Twice in a row, insistent. Twice more when she doesn't answer fast enough. As Rudolpho shoves her aside to open the door for himself and reveal the next commercial-causing cliffhanger — the knocking continues? That just doesn't seem quite right. Until, however long it takes to register, the knocking becomes evident as coming from Janet's own door rather than the one that's since faded off of her television screen.

The evenly timed rapping — which is now starting to sound suspiciously more and more like the melody to a Ricky Martin song — keeps up a couple more times before a voice accompanies it, muffled and distorted behind the wood.

"Delivery for a Miss McCarty~"

"Ahhhhhhhh! Don't end there!!!" Janet says to the television as she still attempts to keep her facial expressions neutral. Although, her puzzle is pretty hard to mask at the sound of her own door. The original knocking is met with a narrowing of her eyes. "I'm being quiet as a mouse, Mrs. Rodriguez…" she calls a little louder until the voice really registers as does the pattern in the knocking. "Curiouser and curiouser," she whispers before standing to her feet, popcorn bowl in hand.

A delivery? For her? But from who? "Just a second!" she calls as she approaches the door and unbolts it several times over before opening it. "I hope you're not selling anything because I —" she begins before she truly looks into the hallway.

Some time between her calling out and the last bolt, the knocker has gotten distracted, breaking the rapped song off mid-chorus. As the door opens, the young man there is looking away, with curly brown hair obscuring his face, but he quickly turns to the newly appearing Janet.

It's been a while since even the post-cards stopped coming, meaning it's been even even longer since Parker's face has been seen around. He's a bit tan, a bit unshaven, but grinning from ear to ear like the sun shines. Arms covered in the sleeves of his corduroy soldier jacket shoot up into the air in a victorious 'V', hindered somewhat by the barrage of shopping bags also lining those arms, as well as the suitcases he's holding in each hand. Various things in them smack together and make ominous clinking sounds of fragile bits breaking, but whatever, who's even paying attention to that right now.

"Tada~!" His bubbly, climatic greeting is pitch-perfect but some shadow of anxiety droops it all after a second of really absorbing what's standing in front of him. In avocado. "Oh, honey— is it age spots?"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!" is the exclamation from the beaming, yet excited, green avacado-laced Janet as she quite literally leaps towards the bag-filled man. "Parker St. James, what are you doing here?! Get inside before you disappear again!" She's still beaming, her lips curled upwards into a toothy grin as she reaches towards him to tug him inside.

"Ohmygoodness! Seriously-where-have-you-been?! I-thought-you'd-gotten-eaten-by-the-lochness-monster-in-Ireland-or-something!!"

And then Parker's question registers. "OH. The masque. Yeah. Not really age spots. Just like severely dry skin. I had no idea New York would do this to me! I blame the smog. And pollution. And stress. I mean seriously, New Yorkers are ALWAYS stressed. ALWAYS. Doesn't matter what's going on, they're stressed out about something. Seriously though, what are you doing here? And where have you been?!"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeee!!" The man echoes her squeal, much to any neighbors' dismay, but he makes no effort to answer her questions just yet. Instead, Parker allows himself to be ushered inside the apartment, dragging his many bags with him, nearly tipping them both over during her first attempts to launch herself on him. "Always," is the first thing out of his mouth when he's inside, hand cutting in the air and making all those fragile things rattle again. "New York is, like, the capital of breakdowns. Didn't I always tell you how fast everybody walks here?"

He laughs at first over his own situation, 'phhhbb'ing a dismissive noise at her. "You wouldn't even BELIEVE all the places I've been. Up to, but not including, the Loch Ness monster. If there was an Irish legend I was interested in running into in the water, you know it'd be Colin Farrell every day of the week. And if you mean the ACTUAL Loch Ness monster in Scotland — then I choose McGregor — no! Isla Fisher. No! I don't know."

"Seriously it's frakking unbelievable that anyone walks that fast! And it's not just anyone, it's EVERYONE!" Janet's eyes widen as she nods incredulously, further drawing Parker into the apartment. "When on earth did you get in?! You better have come here first!! If I hear you've been anywhere else, I will smite you with my Amazonian powers of… awesome. All it takes is a look, my friend. And you know it," she waggles her pointer finger at him before holding up the same finger and disappearing for a few moments. She returns without the masque.

""Oy! Really? Loch Ness is in Scotland?! Then I'd be all over Ewan McGregor. He's a great actor AND the guy can sing. I mean come on!" She grins broadly. "Ohmigosh, I wanna know everything…" the smile is traded for a mock pout and arms over her chest, "and why did you lose touch with me?! Seriously. Seriously!"

Regardless her smile quickly returns as she waves him into the living room towards the couch. "Come sit down! I…. still don't cook, BUT! I made JELLO a few hours ago — I bet it's set by now. It's green~"

All that grinning Parker was doing turns a tad sheepish under the ominous power of that finger. "I got in, like," he whips that burden-laden arm towards himself to eye a nonexistent watch-face. "Two seconds ago. No, really. What was I going to do? Go home?" Psh, scoff, as if! He utilizes the moment she's gone to give a good glance around her apartments. The suitcases are dropped where he's standing, all the other things sliding off his arms into a heap at his feet. By the time she returns, he's somewhat made himself at home by wandering around and examining everything.

"What?" A shocked turn around. Only to be gone an instant later. "Fine. You can have McGregor. But only because you're so AWE-some. And whaaaat? I did not even lose touch. I, like, definitely sent something to you this one time. Pretty sure it explained everything." It didn't.

Thus waved, he follows obediently towards the couch only to back-track at her next statement and pad towards the kitchen instead. "Jello? I will totally get it. Over here? Green is definitely my favorite color today."

"Well, honey, you are home then!" Janet smiles brightly. "I have an extra bedroom that I use as a 'home office,' but we both know it's just the place I store the printer that I don't know how to use and really have no use for considering how paperless we've all gone. Seriously. I can use an X-Box, Playstation, Wii, but I FAIL at printers and photocopiers." She shakes her head and clucks her tongue before getting back on topic, "ANYways… it's yours if you want it. The room. Not the printer. I still might need the printer someday. And maybe I'll need a photocopier. And a fax machine."

"And yes, kitchen's definitely that way! And green JELLO is the single most amazing kind ever. Help yourself. Plates are… in the oven." The last sentence is said somewhat sheepishly. "I don't use the oven often so it seemed like a good storage space… at least it doesn't contain sweaters?"

"Printers have too many settings," Parker assures her sagely, going to open the oven without much hesitation. "And, whatever, what's going to happen to a plate in the oven? I mean, I suppose it could melt, but it's just a plate… suppose smell might be an issue. But eesh, if you had a whole extra home office this whole time, there'd be no excuse, treating clothes to a baking."

When he comes back around to the living room, he's actually opted to go with rounded bowls to prevent the delicious jello from deliciously wriggling its way onto the floor. Clutching the bowls together with two of his fingers, he maneuvers around his luggage, with a glance for each suitcase. "You're a doll, dollface, but you know you don't have to. I'm not a hobo — well, I'm a little bit of a hobo. But I'd like to think I dress a bit better than one." He uses a hand to haughtily adjust the silken light blue scarf around his neck.

"Well the call is yours, my friend! The call is entirely yours! You're welcome here as long as you need — I mean, even if you need to find something else, you can stay temporarily. Mi casa et su casa." Janet issues Parker a broad grin after speaking in her badly uttered Spanish.

"So… I want to know more about your adventures. What did you see? Who did you meet? And… you plan on staying in New York, right? Riiiiiight?!"

Setting the jello bowls on a steady surface, Parker flops onto the couch, all long legs and skinny jeans. He leans back and offers Janet a smooch into the air for her continued offers. "I think I may have met everyone in the world," he tells her ponderously, "Also, protip — truckers may be going long distances but they do nooooot the best rides make. Ewwww." A shudder and wiggled fingers tell more of that story than he does.

Scooting just slightly into a better seated position, he pats the spot next to him. Come, Janet. Join. "Gawd, though, I don't know. It's already happened, it's like I'm not even thinking about that anymore. Oh! But I did think about you. I have just the perfect— " Planning to roll right off the couch again, his gaze strays to the television.
"OH THAT BITCH DID NOT." Janet is of no fault; the show's returned from commercials.

"Ewwwwwwww!" Janet cringes at the thought of truck drivers. "Are they nasty? Ewwwwwwwwww…." The doctor has managed to make herself disgusted again. Her face pales considerably as she reaches for the JELLO. It might make her less squirmy.

She follows him to the couch and sits next to him, holding the bowl of JELLO. "You did?! What did you bring me —"

"INORITE?! Seriously! Why did she let Rudolpho back into her life?! Can you explain that to me?!" her cheeks redden a little, she's very passionate about this show.

"I'm afraid I can't, honeybunch," Parker reaches out to wag a finger at Janet's nose, bopping her on it if she doesn't move. "Girls are just crazy." His smirk is just an ounce sheepish already as he leaps away to stroll up to his many stored belongings. It takes the opening of every single bag before he makes a noise of recollection. By this time, there's souvenirs and various fashionable accessories pulled out every which way.

"Oh, duuuuuh, here," he says, unzipping the side-pocket of the last suitcase he checks. Glancing over his shoulder conspiratorially, he blocks her from seeing what he draws out. Upon standing, his hands leap behind his back to keep the mystery.

Sliiiiiiiding one long leg forward and then the next, he moves closer to the couch, eyeing her with barely contained mischief. "Do you want it? Do you want a present?"

"But Park-eeeeer, I'm not crazy! I'm the most sane girl you ever met! And I will stay that way forever!" she beams. Janet can't help but squee as her nose is bopped. She loves surprises and has since she was a kid! In fact, good surprises are just underneath Superman ice cream. Colours and delights abound. "What is it?! What is it?" She's leaps up from her seat as she creeps towards her friend. "Is it colourful?! OOO! Is it sparkly?! Is it EWAN MCGREGOR?!"

Janet beams brightly as she attempts to peer around Parker's back to see her present. "I want the present! Pleeeeeease! Pleeeeease Parker! If you give it to me I'll be your bestest friend for the rest of your life…" Janet smiles sweetly as she bats her eyelashes. "Pleeeeeeeeeeease!"

Parker stops moving when she starts getting closer, shoulders wiggling with the effort to keep his hands concealed. "Maybe. Maaaybe… What? Yes. Yes, it's Ewan McGregor. He's in my hand, behind my back, because I'm such a big fattie. Way to go, Jan." He'd sound more insulted if he were, you know, actually insulted. Or felt like making the effort to pretend.

As she peers, he twists to the side to avoid her. "OMG, you little minx," he faux-gasps, "Are you saying you're not right now my bestest friend for life? I'm so betrayed!" For which he feels inclined to wave his hand against his chest, over his heart. But that means he's only holding the present with one hand and has to side-step to avoid a REVEAL.

Janet traipses after him, still trying to peek around his back. "Of course I'm a wiley minx! I'm have the brains of the McCarty family, remember?! Erin has the talent. Mikayla has…" she hmmms a moment "…the enthusiasm. And Caleb… well… Caleb has the testes!" She grins broadly. It's a random comment.

"And of course I'll be your best friend for the rest of my life! I'm talking about the rest of yours because we both know I'm gonna go first!! After I die… I promise to haunt you, but in a Casper-the-friendly-ghost kind of way!" She grins brightly as she continues to crane her neck to see.

"Now… gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" Janet bounces in the spot before planting her feet on the floor and trying a different tactic. She crosses her arms over her chest and fake sulks whilst fake pouting. "Pweeease?" Eyelash bat.

"Brains, right," Parker follows along, "Talent.. ehhh. Enthusiasm, okay, and — the testes. Is that all he gets? Really? Poor, poor Caleb. I can see you expect him to have a lot of direction in life." Random works here.

He gets squinty at her for a second. Then: "Oh, riiiight. The whole 'you dying first' thing. That's where I clean out my fortune to buy you a lot and a heart-shaped gravestone, and then will live for twelve more years after so I can continuously keep up the Mexican sunflower and pink petunia patches I'll have planted. They'll surround the whole lot and spell out 'America's Sweetheart' — or, oh wait. Am I getting your funeral and our plans to bury Anne Hathaway confused? Screw it. We'll just put: she had the brains. Then Caleb can really look forward to dying, so his can say: he had the — ohhhhh hell no."

The interruption is thanks to her tactic-switch, which he wiggles a long finger at her face for. "Don't you pout and insert cutesy Ws with me, young lady. I taught you how!"

"Pssssh. Caleb's the token male. Even if he has other talents, he'll be known for the testes and you know it!" Janet chuckles, while still beaming. "I mean he gets to be different just by being …" her eyes shift as a mischievous grin plays on her lips "…different."

"I think that was Anne Hathaway's funeral…?" Now Janet's eyes are squinty as she desperately tries to remember. "Yes. That was Anne Hathaway! But yes. Make sure my flowers say that I'm the brains. You need to take care of the garden well though or I'll evil-haunt you. You know it's true!" she snaps her fingers in the air as she gives a kind of attitude head bob. She beams again. She giggles madly at the thought of Caleb's grave. "None will compare with mine because I will always be your bestie so the others won't get the royal Parker treatment." She smiles sweetly again.

"Darn it!" she squeaks as she stamps her foot. "It's like you know every trick in my book! Everyone else falls for the singing and the dancing and the pouting…." she fake sulks again. "Can I please please please have my present? Please. Please Parker. Because you missed me. And didn't write me enough. And. And. And. I could die before you give it to me. Drop dead any second if we're not careful…" She shrugs nonchalantly.

"Dude, Jan, I'm the only male in my family — dare I ever forget it." Parker spares only enough time out of his smile to roll his eyes. "O to the M, are you using codewords for him saying he was…" The hand he's got in front of him wavers in the air, testing level. "Cause, like, I am not even awake enough for subtlety right now."

Shucks about the funeral, though. He was clearly looking forward to that. "Damn. Anne Hathaway needs to die tragically young already or something, I'm digging this whole petunia thing. Also, then she'll get to be totally GOR-geous. Until she decays and her skin flakes off her rotted bones. But no one cares, because then the casket's closed." Shrug! "Oh, but definitely," and he goes to pinch one of those moisturized cheeks of hers, "We'll put Caleb at the bottom of the hill so his grave can kiss your grave's ass into eternity. Because my Dammit Janet deserves to be treated the best forever and ever."

Can't help a smirk, though, when her pouting is thwarted. "Could you?" He eyes her skeptically, "Could you really die just now— OMG, would it be from anticipation? Ahahaha…" But as he goes to snap his fingers triumphantly for this verbal victory, he does so with the hand that was still holding the present hidden. He stares at the brilliantly rainbow-colored and overly feathered Venetian mask for a second before trying to go backsies on the REVEAL.

"Nooooo." Janet hmms and then wrinkles her nose. "I don't think so! But then, I don't talk to Caleb much. Not anymore. Although I should. I kind of made up with Erin." She grins broadly, "I guess hell froze over…" and then she murmurs more quietly "…or broke down the door…" She shrugs and continues to smile brightly.

"You know what they say, 'Live Short, Die Young, and Leave a Beautiful Corpse.'" Janet giggles and then winks, "And yes, we will make a pilgrimage to her funeral and it will be a-maz-ing. Let's just hope I outlive her!" She laughs at the notion of Caleb's grave kissing her own. "I like Caleb. Even if we're not close… we used to be… triplets and all.. but thank you, I do like to think I deserve the best now and then…"

"Ooooooooooooo. Prettttttty." Janet's eyes widen even as he tries to hide it she keeps craning her neck to look at it again. "Soooooo preeeeeeeeeeeeetty." Craning her neck again, she reaches out grabbyhands for said present, but fakes it out and engulfs Parker in a giant bearhug instead. "This is my real present," she squees quietly.

Doing a little dance backwards on his toes to escaping her grabbing, Parker is taken by complete surprise by the hug. Also, they nearly fall over. But, after a moment of flailing — he's holding a breakable present! — Parker's long arms wrap around her in return, completing enveloping. Combined with her comment, it's a total 'awwww' moment. "Awwwww." See?

The sentimentality lasts right up until Parker tightens his grip enthusiastically and leans back, pulling Janet into the air. "Eeeee! I missed you, sugarplum! You know what?" He settles her back onto her feet. "I will stay here. Just for, like, a couple of days where we can hog out on some ice-cream and catch up. I can just curl up on the floor or something. It'll be fantabulously easy, never you mind."

Unwrapping his arms put the Venetian mask in between them, and he dips it towards her for the taking. Thus unburdened, he regains the couch; and regains Jello. "So. What's this about you and Erin and a kind of, not really Hallmark moment?"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Janet squeals happily as she spun in a circle. As her feet are planted on the floor again she beams, "Excellent! We'll have good fun! We'll watch bad television, gossip, and catch-up on everything!" She gives him another squeeze. "I missed you so much! You're my favourite person in the entire world! Oooo! We'll have so much fun! The freezer is stalked with junk food — I'm a doctor, I don't eat like a real person!" She winks as she finally releases him.

She takes her present, beaming all the while. "It really is beautiful. Imma put it on my wall. Tomorrow. If I can figure out how." Janet's walls are freakishly empty mostly because she doesn't understand the whole stud-finding thing.

She sighs a little at the notion of Erin. "Well, we started speaking and then — " OH NO! How is she supposed to explain this?! " — well maybe you heard. Erin's missing. She hasn't been seen on the set of her show or anything…" This actually causes Janet to frown. To genuinely, all-out-frown.

"Hammer a nail into the wall," Parker suggests lazily, already nomming on his spoon even if it is lacking in green at the moment. "Or hire a hot construction worker to hammer things for you." Ha! Get it?

But — hold it! Even Jello can't stand up to a genuine frown, which is why it gets rapidly set aside. At the rate he's jumping up from the couch every time he gets to sit on it, no eating may actually ever occur. "Shut up, no. Like, missing-missing? Missing and going to wash up on an episode of Law and Order? Or is this, like, a publicity stunt? Because after the whole were-WTF stuff, I am totally ready to believe that they need it. I won't even go into it… unless your whole talking to her thing didn't ruin the appetite for mocking the show. Oh, wait, no… she's missing." He pauses contemplatively, as solemn as this occasion demands. Very seriously: "… Too soon?"

"Yeah. Like police-involved-investigation-kind-of-missing," Janet squeaks before managing to shovel some jello into her mouth. She neglects to mention that she knows where Erin is. Or that she faked her sister's death, instead she frowns again and lowers herself onto the couch slowly. "Yeah. Too soon," she sighs wearily. "I mean, it's not like we were close anymore… but things were getting repaired and now she's all like gone. You know? And I know I made merciless fun of the show, but I kind of found it reassuring seeing her all of the time."

She leans her head back against the couch and stares up at the ceiling. "Why am I so incredibly and irreversibly screwed up? Like, I can mend broken bones, sew stitches, and do an overall damn good job at work, but when something starts getting fixed emotionally in my life… I'm totally FAIL."
It seems at first like being told teasing is off the docket might keep Parker quiet for a bit, but she ultimately ruins that by saying these silly things. He's back on the couch in a speedy second, legs crossed and turned towards Janet with a hand on her shoulder. "Don't you dare, carebear. If you were talking to her again, good for you. That's doesn't make you screwed up, and neither does this untimely police-involved-investigation-kind-of-missing. Hey, hey, hey, hey." Each interjection timed with a prod he gives her in that same shoulder. "Look at me, beautiful, and promise me you won't mention the big fat F-word again unless we're sitting here watching the latest season of American Idol."

"Thanks Parker," Janet sighs as she leans against him. "It's just so hard, you know? Like what if Erin and I are destined to not be close ever again? And why did I let so much time pass? And what if everything is just… irreversibly screwed up… you know?" Closing her eyes gently, she manages another sigh. "I promise."

And then a small smile edges Janet's lips, "So… moving back here and planting some roots or are you just passing through?"

Parker obligingly holds Janet closer as she leans, his head tilted back slightly so he can still try and catch her eye at dramatic moments. "Pssh. When has Doc McCarty ever let a little something like destiny hold her back? Besides, it's happened now, hasn't it? So screw it. Don't like how it turned out, you just do something else. Whatever." Long-term thinking has never really been one of his strong-points.

He leans forward around her lean to catch that smile, giving her a little wink in return. Settling back, though, he gives a low hum of thought. "Roots sounds dirty. And I mean, like, ruining my pedicure dirty. Though, now that I think about it, pretty sure I could bend it the other way, too. I'm terribly flex— oh! Thaaaat's right! How did I not even tell you? Janny!" Shake shake shake to her shoulder so that she'll sit up and he can deliver his proud news properly. "I teach!" Important pause. "Yoga!"
"I love that you're an eternal optimist, my friend. I need more people like you around. It would make my life so much more… zen," Janet nods at this thought before her grin broadens even more.

She giggles at the notion of ruining Parker's pedicure. "It probably would, I think! I mean all of that dirt… yucky," she wrinkles her nose before smiling again. "There was too much other things to discuss first. Like my present." She sits up a bit from the couch, leaning forward slightly, "Yoga? That's amazing! You'd be so good at that. Look at you! All growed up and teaching peoples!" she reaches up to pinch his cheek lightly. "I knew it would happen someday. But now what will I do with my little Parker all adult?!"

"I know, it's — heeeyy! All growed up, huh? All growed up, she says." His eyes narrow, but not very seriously, when she pinches him. Parker waits until her hand has retracted to dart in and give the side of her stomach a squeeze. He uncrosses one leg from the other at the same time, so he can move more freely. There's another attack waiting after the first one, even if only to block her from any attempted retaliation. "Now take it back, wench! The day we have to take my life seriously is the day I die! I shall not be a lemming! Even though I played that game a lot as a child!"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Janet squeals loudly as her stomach is squeezed. Her mouth gapes open, but she's smiling, this is just part of the game. She leaps up and he manages to get her again, "Eeeeeee!" Instead of retaliating with another pinch, she tosses a piece of green jello at him. "Jelloed!" she declares. "And I WON'T take it back!" She grin broadens even more as she takes a small step back.

Parker's mouth gapes open as he's pelted with JELLO! "O… MY.. GOD, you did not ju — ENGARDE!" Which is the only tricksy warning she gets before he dives at his own helping of the green stuff and flings it at her. The dramatic movement nearly tips him over, but he recovers by stuttering to his feet and then spinning to find some other ammunition. "OH. You will when I'm done with you!" He declares, but distractedly, because there's pretty much nothing within his arm's reach that's toss-able beyond, well, Janet's present. Which isn't toss-able. It would break, people would cry. This was war — but that didn't mean they couldn't be civilized… and stick to soft foods.

"I DID!" Janet declares back as she tosses another piece of JELLO at her friend. "HA! TAKE THAT!" She's grinning broadly and giggling as she slowly backs up towards the kitchen. Yup. She wants more soft food, and while she'll have to clean the mess later, the prospect of a food fight is all too tempting not to engage in. "Oooooo. There's pudding in the fridge…" griiiiin.

She's gonna have to be faster than that, because Parker hears her giddy remarks and rushes over to kitchen, wrapping arms around her in a backwards version of that hug from earlier. Including that he attempts to lift her off the ground and deposit her behind him. Anything to put her in another direction long enough to grab the first two things he can get his hands on from that open fridge. Looking at them may be his undoing, though, because, eyeing one hand, he is forced to comment, "Jello and pudding, babygirl? I hope there's a chocolate cake in your cupboard, too."

Fortunately for Janet, this is her kitchen. When she's put behind him she squeals loudly, which unfortunately, causes someone to bang against the wall. "I'm not making that much noise, Mrs. Rodriguez!" Janet calls as she rifles through her cupboards and manages to find: THE FLOUR. She takes a handful and tosses it in Parker's general direction. "I'm warning you: I have more!"

Her expression turns slightly crestfallen, however, at the notion of cake. "I don't bake! Remember? I use my stove to store plates!" Yet she has flour. Go figure.

There's another bang on the wall to which Janet calls loudly, "I DON'T WANT TO DATE JORGE EITHER!! AND I'M NOT MAKING THAT MUCH NOISE!"

Except she is. For once.

"You can buy —" FOOF! Parker has been floured in the face. The tiny powder finds perfect home in his curly hair and along his fancy scarf. For a second, all he does is blink. Then huff out a breath that shoots half the flour back out into the air in front of him. "That'd be your oven."
He's scooping a hand into some of that pudding when the second bang gets his attention clearly more than the first. Janet's loud reply gets a squint from him. But first — the pudding gets slopped at her. Because, dammit, now he has flour in his hair. "Who is Jorge and why does he care how much noise you make?"

"Ugh," Janet cringes — although she's still beaming — as chocolate pudding is slopped across her pink hoodie. "Oh man!" Rolling her eyes, her gaze turns to the wall and she lowers her voice as a just-in-case measure, "Well. Mrs. Rodriguez is my neighbour. She thinks I'm always too loud when I'm not doing ANYTHING! And her son Jorge," she shudders, "is like thirty-five, living at home, and not working. She wants to set us up. And tries ALL of the time." Janet virtually gags.

But the gagging ceases as she gets an idea. She giggles as she begins to traipse after her friend, "Parker~ C'mon give 'ole Janny a hug?"

As Janet explains, Parker begins to use both hands to pull out his springy curls, bunch by bunch, sweeping bits of flour off here and there. "Psh, she should get over it. She could be loud if she wanted to. It's not, like, illegal, right? Though pawning off your bum son should be. If he had any name but Jorge, I might be able to imagine some of those swarthy exotic looks…"

He trails off almost wistfully, wandering out of the kitchen and not bothering to either stop nor glance back when the girl's tactics suddenly change. He still has this hair to attend to, after all, and he's eyeing it with all his attention. "Nuh uh. You've got flour in your hand and pudding on your pink."

"I know, right? And Jorge is gross," Janet cringes again. Nope, she doesn't like Jorge, not remotely. "Now if I had a different neighbour… tall, dark, handsome, stoic, solid jaw, large hands, dark eyes, deep voice… mmmm…" Yup, she's imagining Agent Morris again. Her cheeks redden slightly as she pushes him out of her thoughts again.

She leaps at him from behind, aiming to wrap her arms around him again. "Never leave again okay… NEVER EVER EVER."

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