|AIR DATE 2011.08.26|
|Synopsis: As usual, Van Dallas is attempting to get laid. Meanwhile, Jake is attempting to not get fired.|
|Take Me Home Tonight|
"So. You comin' home with me or what, tonight?"
That would be none other than the insatiable and possibly irritating Van Dallas, as he hangs over the side of some random phone using secretary of hotness. He's still in one of his Blaine Carmichael outfits, so the leather jacket is making him look even more hot than he usually does, whilst he is making sure to make the Sexy Eyes at this Damsel in a Mini-Dress.
For her part, she's all smiles and giggles and playing coy. She's screwed.
"Look here, I'm walking into the building right now. Right now! See? Here." Jane marches up to the desk, sets her cell phone down, then reaches over to grab an unused handset. She punches in the intercom code. "Jane Ashdown is in the building. On the overhead now, isn't that lovely? Oh, Van. Hi, darling. Who is this girl you're chatting up? Hello, sweetie. He's fantastic, highly recommend." With that, she slams the receiver back down and scoops her cell phone back up. "I'll be there in a minute. Have some coffee ready for me, will you? Appreciate it."
Van is relaxed. Jane is relaxed. The secretary? Is very much relaxed. But it's a cardinal rule that someone in the building is feeling exasperated at any given moment, and today it's Jake's turn. "There you are," he growls, walking up toward Van and gesturing toward the leather jacket. "I need to check the pockets on that thing. We're missing a packet of flashbangs, and that's where I saw it last, and the beancounters are up my ass about— Look, you've got connections, can you tell them to hire someone with a Find Stuff ability? We've all got other things to be doing." A vague nod toward Jane, belatedly realizing that he may or may not have just butted ahead of her, conversation-wise.
Van is rolling his eyes, but still smiling at the same time. "Babe. I've got to run. Duty calls. But I'm still waiting on an answer. Don't you let me down." Van is pushing away from the cubicle and giving a bit of a finger wave of flirtatiousness at the secretary, before turning to see both Jane and Jake. "Hey hey! J & J Music Factory! What's up!" Van's arms go out wide as he is always feeling like he's the life of the party. "Jane, baby, you were amazing today. Please tell me you wanna' run more than lines later." Wink. "Jakester! Feel free to search me for flashbangs, my man!" He holds up a finger. "But! You gotta' use her hands." And that finger points to Jane.
"Really?" Jane looks more amused than offended. "You're going to have me frisk you up while your latest foray is sitting right there?" She waves a hand in the secretary's direction. "Alright then." The dark-haired Brit glances over at Jake and offers him a wink before turning her attention back to Van. "First off, assume the position. Secondly, don't do that J & J Music Factory bit again. It's bad."
"Yes, Ma'am." comes from Van's lips as he spreads his legs and throws his hands on his head. His fingers lock behind his sexy hair and he's already turning to look in the direction of his secretary. "It's for a good cause, isn't it?" Though, the way his eyes are speaking to her basically scream: She Could Be You. And then Jake has to go ahead and get his dissing on of Van's clever wordplay. "Hey. Come on. Neither one of you can even begin to claim you didn't rock out to New Kids or Backstreet Boys. Don't even try it. They were hot shit in their day." Another wink at his secretary conquest. "… Like I am in mine." Oh Brother.
"Sorry, no. Perhaps you've heard of the Spice Girls, though?" Jane pats down the pockets of Van's pants first. Even though Jake's already pointed out where he thinks the flashbangs are. "Got to be thorough, yeah? Just in case you've stashed some other contraband in here." She flashes Van an impish grin. Eventually, she does fish the 'bangs out of the jacket pocket and lobs them underhand over towards Jake.
Jake shakes his head again, reaching out and catching the low-grade explosives well before they have a chance to damage anything. Like, say, his ability to keep the beancounters at bay. "Don't forget the cavity search," he offers to Jane, deadpan. "Ginger would totally do a cavity search, just to be thorough." Then, leaving her to it, he takes a step back and pulls out a walkie-talkie. "Yeah, I found it. The new backgrounds come in yet? Okay, I'll be down in a minute to go over it, make sure they didn't do anything stupid like print the copyright mark on the front. Swear I'm mailing 'em a box of diapers if they pull that on us again."
"Contraband? Is that what you're calling it now?" There's a quick qink that is given to Jane, before Van finds himself looking over at Jake and flashing a grin. He's all about the making sure that there are never any hard feelings. At least, not from the help. "You're the man, Jake! You make Nightlife what it is! Never forget that!" Awww, see? Just because he was trying to steal some flashbangs doesn't mean he's a jerk! Right? Right?!
"I'll leave Ginger to it, then." Jane takes a step back from Van, hands up. His comment about contraband draws a grin from her and she shrugs her shoulders. "In polite company, yes." The playful demeanor drains away a bit as she takes on a slightly more serious mien. "I'm going to hold you to that offer to practice lines, Van. And," she wags a finger at him, "no shenanigans out of you."
Never attribute to malice what can be reasonably explained by accidental walking off, that's Jake's policy. If the jacket Van's wearing is supposed to be checked out from the on-set inventory, too? It's not SFX, so it's not Jake's problem. Instead, just a quick nod, and he moves to head off… in a minute. He's got something else to say to Jane first. "Hey, how long are you around for? Maybe get a drink later?" Hey, if it works for the big name…
Van moves quickly, sliding his arm around Jane's shoulder in an almost protective manner. "Now now, Jakey. Are you even old enough to get wasted with the big dogs? I mean, didn't you just hear Jane here practically beg me to help her with her lines? She's all about these shenanigans right here, my man." There's some waggling of the eyebrows that's happening too. Because Van is just that cheese doodley. He glances over his shoulder, though, to mouth to the secretary: 'Call Me.' Wink.
Jane gives an exaggerated roll of her eyes and lightly thumps Van in the chest with the back of her hand. "This weekend is terrible for me, Jake. I do need to run lines with Mister Tall, Dark, and Flirty over here and then pop down to the campus to grab my books. Classes are starting up against next week. We'll raincheck though, yeah?"
As it happens, Jake is indeed nice and shiny and legal. Not that it stops him from getting carded with alarming regularity, what with the awkward babyface look he's never managed to shed, and so Van's antics are once again just water off the duck's back. "Sure, next week, maybe. —Okay, I'm coming!" he adds, pulling out the walkie-talkie again and glowering at it. He'd glower at the Bluetooth earpiece, too, if it wasn't inconveniently attached to his ear at the time.
Van's hand moves from Jane's shoulder down to around her waist. He puts on his parental voice. "He's such a good kid. We really ought to get him a bike for Christmas." And then he's looking up with great speed and over at Jane. "Think you can keep your hands to yourself long enough for us to get back to my place?" Oh, this is going to be a long night.
"They grow up so fast, don't they?" Jane cups her cheek in her palm and sighs wistfully. "I think I could manage. Perhaps. First, though, I've got to pop upstairs to get this fitting over with. I was supposed to be there," she checks the clock hung on the wall, "oh, about… twenty minutes ago." She arches a brow at him and grins. "We can go up to wardrobe together and you can turn your jacket back in, you bloody thief."